


You had me at Hello.

by Search_N_Destroy



Category: Gerard Way and the Hormones, My Chemical Romance
Genre: Artist Gerard Way, Established Relationship, F/M, Falling In Love, Friends to Lovers, Plans For The Future, Romantic Comedy, Swearing, Touring
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-25
Updated: 2017-10-25
Packaged: 2019-01-23 01:28:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12495384
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Search_N_Destroy/pseuds/Search_N_Destroy
Summary: I’d never really given much thought to love during the course of my life, because it seemed to be an ambiguous phenomenon that caused both joy and sadness, a hushed word on teenaged lips or a snare for the older more wiser souls.





	You had me at Hello.

You had me at hello.  
I’d never really given much thought to love during the course of my life, because it seemed to be an ambiguous phenomenon that caused both joy and sadness, a hushed word on teenaged lips or a snare for the older more wiser souls.  
I suppose unconsciously I was aware of love.... in one form or another, for example I love sitting in the rain.... the smell of new grass and the sweet taste of chocolate but for most people that wasn’t enough. I was young and free spirited living each day as if it were my last and using every ounce of strength I owned to carve out an impressive career as a professional dancer whilst most woman my age were settled with husbands and children and a nine to five life.

I was contented.... others would ask me when I was going to grow up and settle down, find a man to tame my wild ways and have sensible hair, but I liked my bright pink hair and I definitely don’t need acceptance from others in order to live my life.  
Don’t get me wrong, I had no problem with guys in actual fact I had more male friends then I did female... I just never really got into the whole kissing boys thing, it was like I was doomed to be super unimpressed with the world. There was no guy I looked at and thought I’d like to spend a large portion of my time with let alone be romantic with and so I would brush off those comments like shedding skin every time a family member got married and one of them would turn to me with that expectant look.

And so I buried my head in my work, got tattoos made friends and put rings in my lip because it was all ways of making a statement about the person I was and not who I should be for society’s sake. And when I had exasperated my parents enough with my wayward lifestyle and lack of normality I would look for work further afield in the vain hopes that people would just stop caring.  
So when a job came up in Los Angeles I jumped at it leaving the cold streets of Michigan behind me and looking instead towards a new state and new faces and perhaps a new inspiration.  
I remember arriving on set of the music video I had been selected for and having the concept of the piece explained to me in rushed tones by who I believed to be one of the producers, we were shooting a funeral.  
I was shown into a small room where a woman dressed me all in a blur as people rushed about fixing lights and make up and it dawned on me that we were in a church something my complete lack of observation skills hadn’t picked up on, I think I mumbled something about not being use to such a busy set up and the girl had just laughed at me as she pulled me down the steps to the main area.

I was aware then of a young man sat across from me in the pews looking uneasy and tired but intently focused upon me as the director strode towards me looking me over quickly before sighing and shaking his head. He voiced his dismay in the fact that my hair was bright pink as it didn’t go with the look of the shoot and that it hadn’t said on my resume that I had such bright hair or a half sleeve tattoo.  
Rather making apologies for his imagined slights I informed him that my resume was purely to showcase my work and that appearance in most dance situations were irrelevant, but he wasn’t having any of it and turned to point to another dark haired girl calling out that she would be taking my place as the main heroine though I would still be needed to teach the other dancers the routine I’d choreographed and e-mailed to him the previous week.

I had just turned to leave when the silent watcher stood up from his perch and began to argue with the director on my behalf telling him to ‘let her dance’ he put up quite a fight for such a quiet soul and I wondered briefly why he was so interested in my dancing for the video.  
Finally knowing when he was beat he finally threw a glance my way and in those few seconds I saw something in his expression that was close to apologetic before he flew from his place shouting the word ‘bullshit’ as his raven hair disappeared through the open door, leaving only a puff of smoke in his wake indicating that he had lit a cigarette before fully exiting the building.  
I took that as my que to leave and get out of the dress they had put me in so that my replacement could get ready for her new role, not that it bothered me too much as I wasn’t really one for dresses anyway and whether or not I was in front or behind the camera I’d still be getting my work out there and paid for the privilege. 

We reset and began to shoot the choreographed scenes with me making tweaks here and there as only a true artist would and in between the dancers the band would come in for their scenes bringing with them my argumentative comrade who as he had shown before surveyed the unfolding events with a level expression of amusement and leadership.  
I learned quickly from a young dancer that this strange man was in actual fact the front man and vocalist of the band whose video we were shooting, and it wouldn’t be the last time I would encounter this gentleman.  
The day was soon over as the lights shut off and everyone was encouraged to go home though stragglers seemed to be reluctant to leave, I grabbed my stuff and pushed my way through the heavy wooden doors out into the unusually rainy LA air. No sooner had I reached the bottom of the stone steps I noticed that guy from the band again, casually leant up against the hearse as he smoked nonchalantly staring into space with a deep concentration furrowing his brow.  
I ducked my head wrestling with my hood against the wind hoping that he hadn’t seen me when I heard the newly familiar musical voice call out “Hey miss floss, making a quick getaway?” resigning myself to the fact that it would be rude and somewhat awkward at work the next day to ignore him I turned slowly in his direction and nodded quickly “yeah, I’ve got to get across town before it gets dark” I spoke in a tone I hoped conveyed my urgency to leave but he continued.

“Yeah.... better get home before the city of angels turns into the city of demons, floss” he sighed his smile coming through the tone of his voice.

I continued to walk at first but something made my feet stop suddenly and I turned once more to face the man who had plagued me all day “Who’s floss?” I inquired stepping slightly closer as the wind and rain picked up.  
He raised his hazel eyes to me then almost perplexed as he uttered “like candy floss, you know your hair?” he shrugged as if I should have known not to ask such a silly question “well” I began feeling oddly offended “that’s not my name! And I’d thank you to not make up names for people based on appearance or I will have to refer to you as greasy” I replied curtly as his eyes searched my face almost amused “Well you never told me your name” he blinked at me unapologetically “You could have asked” I replied feeling the heat in my face rising with annoyance.  
“You never asked mine” he countered causing me to sigh harshly in exasperation “Did I want to know yours! I am here to do a job” I resisted the urge to stamp my foot like a child but there was something about this guy that frustrated me for no apparent reason. “Calm down princess, you’ll still get paid whether you know my name or not.... mines Gerard just for arguments sake” he offered casually.  
“I am not a princess!” I scalded weighing the options of throttling him or just turning and walking away as fast as I could without going to jail for murder “Clearly” he reasoned “after all princess’ are polite” I growled losing my temper as I strode towards him closing the gap between us fast “You are so frustrating and annoying! And I’m starting to think that this whole funeral set up should be yours if you keep irritating the shit out of people like this” I spat feeling slightly better for it.

“Hmm” he pondered for a moment “I usually get bastard or freak.... so I must be going up in the world.... and the funeral idea? Well that’s to say goodbye to my grandma” his smile was sad this time as he cast his eyes back to the puddles on the sidewalk.  
I suddenly felt the pickling heat of shame in the pit of my stomach as I weighed his last comment carefully whilst he lit another cigarette quietly “Oh... I am so sorry, I.... didn’t know” I offered meekly feeling all the anger turn to absolute shame.  
“The only people who need to know is me, my brother and her” he said honestly before the silence resumed. The streets were getting darker now and I really wanted to get home before I had to wander the streets alone at night “I better get going” I said quietly as I walked back to the spot I had started at “Aren’t you going to tell me your name?” he called again from his place behind me “It’s Axel” I threw over my shoulder “pretty name..... For what it’s worth... I think you should have danced today” I waved my hand in acknowledgement and as I reached the corner I heard “see you tomorrow Axel” 

I arrived the next day as usual to the hustle and bustle of people and placed my stuff in the little make shift room, I had mixed feelings this morning after my encounter with Gerard the previous evening and I wasn’t quite sure what to make of him.... After all he was the most infuriating individual I had ever met but yet there was something about him that intrigued me beyond all reason and as much as I wanted nothing more than to avoid him like the plague I also wanted to see how he would annoy me today.  
I went to the makeup trailer as I was informed that the dancers were getting ready only to find that they had already left for set, I spun on my heals quickly wanting to catch them before shooting began but got distracted by the makeup artist who was having a minor argument with someone who’s voice I recognised. I was fighting the urge to leave when the woman asked “can I help you?” I popped my head back around the corner shaking it profusely as I explained that I was looking for the dancers and was leaving, she just rolled her eyes and turned back to Gerard who was being his usual charming self “Stop closing your eyes!” she was shouting “I can’t help it..... Deal with it!” I heard a sharp slapping sound before she told him to get out and moments later he jogged down the metal steps looking rather impressed with himself.  
“Hey Axel” he caught up with me as I continued my long walk to set “Oh hey” I replied not really looking at him “Did she just slap you?” I asked without thinking, he just chuckled “she’s my girlfriend..... she hates me” he shrugged as if this was perfectly normal as he smudged all the eyeliner she had just applied on his lower lids and informed me “I don’t like it too neat” 

I frowned but never slowed my pace “And that’s normal?” he gave up smudging for a moment as he thought it through “It’s normal in Gerard town, why? Do you want to report my abuse to the cops?” he mocked gently

“No.... lord knows you deserve it sometimes” I teased in equal measure “But it is a horrible thought, being with someone who hates you” I rationalised but he just shrugged and scratched his head “I got nothing better to do” I tutted loudly but before I could comment one of his band mates bounced up to him full of giggles and tugged him away for no doubt more mischief before they had to settle down.  
I continued with my work and by the time we had finished the shoot I was confident that the finished product would not only look amazing but would highlight my skills as a choreographer, and I was happy with that as I packed up my belongings and bid goodbye to the guys I’d been working with and headed out into the night to hail a cab.  
“Oh surprise, surprise” I said as I spied Gerard sitting on the church steps smoking yet another cigarette “you’re not a stalker are you?” I asked crossing my arms against my chest for warmth as he lent back, elbows resting on the step behind him and his head tilting back so that he could see me clearly “Only nine to five on business days, but it’s just after nine so I’d say you’re safe” he mused.

I rolled my eyes playfully “I’ll cancel the bat signal then” I replied as I made my way down the stairs “Yeah that’s probably best seeing as I can’t really kick my own ass” I actually laughed this time “Dude, you are not batman” 

He stood up suddenly as if I’d threatened his manhood and raising his hand he began to count off the similarities “Erm, loner.... slightly creepy.... sounds croaky in the morning, though I think that’s techniquely from smoking too many cigarettes.... likes black clothing.... in actual fact I just need loads of money and a huge car and I am set” 

I smiled broadly “so you don’t have loads of money?” I asked amused standing nearer the curb as I awaited his reply “I sleep on a van floor, don’t shower and live on chips, cigarettes and booze.... totally billionaire playboy material” he drawled sarcastically as he came to stand just metres away from me.

“Hmmm that’s poker chips right?” I joked as he smiled wryly “Oh yeah.... and my underwear is made out of hundred dollar bills for extra comfort” I slapped him playfully “stop being a jerk! And also don’t tell people you don’t shower because that’s vile, also booze and cigarettes aren’t good for you” I said making myself painfully aware that I sounded like my mother.

He chuckled, feigning injury where I’d slapped him “That’s why I am a sexy beast though” the sarcasm thick in his voice “But I am in actual fact trying to be a good boy with the latter two” he sighed shoving his hands deep into his pockets “Your failing” I teased as he looked down at the ground almost sad “It’s what I do best” he shrugged.  
I shuffled feeling awkward “Failing at being a good boy I meant” I told him in what I hoped was an apologetic manner, he bit his bottom lip concealing his urge to grin “and why exactly am I not a good boy?” his question was soft and musical as he glanced up from beneath his fallen fringe.  
I coughed uneasily wondering how I’d gotten into such a conversation with a man I barely knew in the middle of the night on a cold Los Angeles street “Because you are single headedly the most frustrating, irritating, weird and intriguing person I have ever met and at least 99% of the time I think about smothering you” I finished slightly out of breath as he stood their silently looking at me, his eyebrow raised.

“And you call ME the weirdo?” he asked slowly as if he was trying to make sense of it, I rolled my eyes and shook my head not really knowing how to reply “Though you do find me intriguing.... that’s nice, it’s like someone is actually interested in what I have to say for a change” I raised my hands in the air exasperatedly though I didn’t really know myself what at “There’s no winning with you!” he cocked his head to one side looking interested “What are you trying to win?” his voice became soft again and encouraging as if he was trying to coax something from me.  
“I don’t know! Look Gerard, it’s late and I need to go” I babbled sticking my arm out to attract a cab as the traffic went by “Okay, well I just wanted to give you this” he reached his hand out towards me with a piece of paper between his fingers, I took it gingerly “What’s this?” I asked as a cab pulled up to the curb “My number.... you know for other projects because I think you’re a great artist and it would be nice if we could work together again” he nodded absent mindedly “Or you know.... if you ever feel like you need a little irritation from time to time” he giggled turning to walk away as the driver of the cab asked if I was actually going to get in or if he should go.  
Feeling rushed I hurriedly replied “And what if I don’t text you? You don’t have my number” he continued to walk but shouted whilst still not looking at me “Marc has it” as he slunk back into the shadows and I was left alone with the cab.

The months passed and the work continued in a steady pace, I’d made the move to Los Angeles permanently as that seemed to be where the majority of the action was and it seemed silly to have to commute back and forth from Michigan when I could just pool all of my money and buy a nice apartment near downtown Hollywood.  
And that’s exactly what I did much to the dismay of my parents, they reluctantly helped me move to my new neighbourhood and even gave me pepper spray as a new home gift which though thoughtful was a little over protective for my liking. I had also remained in contact with Gerard though e-mails and texts and every so often he’d call me from the road making out like he had some amazing project that he needed my skills for and insisting that they were ‘business calls’ but I knew he just wanted someone to talk to and who would listen to all his random ramblings.  
We met up a few times for ‘business coffee’ at the local starbucks and exchanged ideas for possible future videos as well as a quick trip to the comic book store so that he could give me a full education on everything marvel and DC. I watched with intrigue as he poured lovingly over the old dusty tomes looking like such a geek in his white shirt, black waistcoat and suit trousers not to mention his polished black shoes.  
I’d teased him slightly when he’d appeared in his outfit of choice, raven hair quaffed and shining in the LA sunlight but he’d merely shrugged and mumbled something about a photo shoot he had attended before our meeting and he didn’t want to battle against the LA traffic to get home and change. I smiled as I took in all the changes Gerard had undergone in the few short years that I’d known him and wondered as I always did if the next time we met I’d be able to recognise him as I knew he was ever changing like the seasons.  
Sensing my gaze he looked up from his study with a puzzled look, I informed him of my conclusions about his ever changing appearance and when I asked him what colour his hair would be next time we saw each other so I could recognise him he hissed something unintelligible under his breath as he rolled his eyes and resumed his reading.

This was a habit of Gerard’s due to his despise of people focusing on the image and not the music, and when I happened to catch an interview with them one morning on one of the many music channels I could see why.  
Another couple years rolled by and I’d had barely any word from Gerard other than the odd text on my birthday or random questions about dance moves via e-mails, so life continued in the fashion which allowed me to move to a bigger apartment and rent my very own dance studio so I could now take on classes which in between all my other commitments kept me passionate for the art and helped with the bills.  
I was locking up the office at the back of the studio one night after a late class when someone appeared out of the shadowy depths of the studio behind me, thinking fast I grabbed the long discarded pepper spray and wheeled around to spray my intruder in the face when I was momentarily stunned by the sight of him.  
There stood a now platinum blonde Gerard with extremely short hair, his face painted like a skeleton and dressed in some sort of military uniform, he raised his arms up defensively “Woah Axel chill!” he called out as his eyes grew wide in shock.

“Fuck sakes Gerard!” I hissed finally dropping my arm and my ‘deadly’ weapon “what the hell are you doing sneaking up on me dressed like a freaking mad man!?” I demanded the breath I hadn’t known I was holding exhaling sharply as my heart began to slow 

He also dropped his hands from their guarding position “Shit, I’m sorry Axel jeeze, I just came for a look around and to say hi.... maybe invite you out tonight, I also look like a mad man every day of the year.... it’s kinda my thing.” he looked like a kid who had been scolded by his mother.

I sighed feeling the panic subsiding “I’m sorry I just wasn’t expecting to see you here, you’ve been MIA for a while and I didn’t think I’d told you about this place” I explained.

He screwed his face up in contemplation “I hear things.... you’re making a name for yourself after all, and yeah we’ve been busy and I am also sorry for not being around much, I’ve been working through some shit you know? Also there’s a new album” he tagged on the end as he pointed to his unusual outfit. 

“Yeah I heard” I countered placing my hand on my upper left arm awkwardly. He noticed it then, excitement lighting his features as he gently pulled my hand away to gaze at the black and white half sleeve tattoo which bore the James Jean artwork from the new album cover “Wow” he whispered as his fingers danced along the lines of the intricate piece childlike fascination in his tentative touch.  
Goose pimples erupted along my skin filling my chest with an odd sensation I’d never felt before “did you do this for me?” he asked in awe snapping me out of my deep train of thought “No!” I shrieked my cheeks flushing red with the indignation “I like James Jean’s work, and that’s a nice piece.”

He withdrew his hand slowly looking even more awkward than usual “Oh..... I didn’t mean....” he trailed off coughing to change the subject “Anyway I came here to invite you to our gig seeing as we’re playing just around the block and thought it would be nice for you to see us in action again” 

I shuffled my feet restlessly, “I have to be at work early tomorrow” I said gesturing back towards the studio in a half hearted attempt at an excuse “On a Sunday?” he asked screwing his face up in disgust “have you not heard that Sundays a day of rest?” I shrugged still not meeting his gaze “someone’s got to pay the bills” he looked down then, careful thought etched over his face.  
“How much do you make in a day then?” he asked bluntly, I still couldn’t get use to the personal questions he would throw out every so often so was caught off guard “That really is none of your business!” I hissed quickly looking around to see if the street was empty for fear of being overheard; it wasn’t until I turned back to him that I noticed the wad of cash in his hands which he flicked through casually.  
He handed me $300 as if it were monopoly money something of which Gerard never did because he kept all of his personal affairs just that, personal and private “What the hell are you doing!?” I asked trying to shove the notes back at him hurriedly “Covering your Sunday bills” he replied in a sing song voice “will you keep your voice down!” I pleaded as I stuffed the notes into the top of his jacket seeing as he wouldn’t take them willingly.

“You don’t have to pay me! I’m your friend, honestly Gerard your thought process’ some times....” I trailed off as he interrupted “So you’ll come to the gig!?” I sighed “I didn’t say that” he looked shocked “okay, that’s fine.... I’ll just be going then” he drawled in a lofty tone flinging himself around dramatically his hands in the air the notes falling from his collar as he began his sombre march “After all only one of my BEST FRIENDS would actually bother to spend time with her aging friend and see his life’s work before the white light comes for him” I walked behind him picking up the fallen notes as he continued on his rant “Gerard, you are only two years older than me” I reminded him as I tried to keep up, but he just raised his voice “Grandmother it that you?? You want me to come into the light with you??” he spoke to the sky as I rolled my eyes and huffed “Gerard! For goodness sakes stop being such a drama queen”  
It was only as I looked up that I noticed that we were outside a club with its neon lights lighting up the puddles on the dark street with the words ‘My chemical romance here tonight 11pm’ I stood upright staring at it as I clutched the now soggy dollar bills to my chest most likely looking like some sort of vagrant.  
Gerard suddenly wheeled around to face me, a look of faux surprise on his painted face “Oh well would you look at that! How’d we end up here? Maybe I should lure you places with dollar bills more often” he remarked as he steered me through the side entrance to the building.

We were backstage and I could see all the various crew members running around with their headsets buzzing away as they checked strings and electrics and swapped out various pedals and guitar straps, I’d never seen a set so busy and I had to dodge people as Gerard continued to pull me through the chaos until someone stopped him dead.  
A tall skinny guy with a clipboard stood in our path as he rattled on about stage lighting and timings and how Gerard had not informed them that he had left the building and now that put them behind schedule, Gerard argued that he was back in plenty of time and also concluded that being an adult he was pretty sure he didn’t need permission to go for a walk or to go and collect a friend from around town.  
Whilst the discussion was taking place a small mousy brown hair girl showed up and began dressing Gerard in what looked like a hospital gown as I began to wonder if this was all some Alice in wonderland kind of deal and expecting the white rabbit to appear any moment, it didn’t but what did appear was a hospital gurney which Gerard promptly boarded before turning to me and adding ‘Madison will take you to your seat, enjoy the show!” as he was wheeled away and I was taken to my seat by the same girl who had dressed him minutes before.

The show was spectacular and I felt my eyes grow wide as the story unfolded, of course Gerard had gone to the trouble of setting me up in my own little area where there was a table and a note which read ‘for the v.v.v.i.p!’ because that is the kind of person Gerard is full of flamboyance and a child like charm.  
I waited till the show ended and people were filing out from the tiny building as they chatted excitedly about what had just taken place as well as singing all the songs they’d heard, I even heard a couple of girls giggling about how hot all the guys were as well as implying some rude intentions for Mikey way which if he had been present would more than likely make him flush as bright as the pyrotechnics.  
I was just getting my things together when I felt a presence sweep across the back of my chair “and where do you think you’re going?’ the voice asked coolly as I rolled my eyes and sighed “I am going to bed Gerard as I need to get up for work tomorrow remember?” I said as I raised myself to my feet still not turning around to look at him, “But I want a cheeseburger!” he whined playfully as I finally turned around to see a now clean faced and casually dressed Gerard with his hood up and his phone in his hand.

“I told you I need to work tomorrow, I am away from Monday so I need to get things in order before I leave” I countered as he surveyed his phone with mild intrigue “where are you going?” I began to walk towards the exit as he followed me slowly “I’m going on tour with a dance troupe as the troupe leader” I informed him as I pushed the exit door open back into the windy dark street.  
“Well then, I think it is only fair that you come and have a cheeseburger with me before you jet off around the world and become far too famous to associate with Jersey trash like me” he teased lightly, though there was something almost sad about his tone.  
“You are not trash” I scolded confused at why he would say such a thing, I thought about everything I had to do tomorrow before packing up and shipping out and came to the conclusion that a couple more hours wouldn’t make much difference in the grand scheme of things so I agreed to go with him.  
He smiled “I know a little place, come on.... I promise I’ll have you back before you turn into a pumpkin” he promised as he showed me to his car which I laughed at “So you sell millions of records and you go and buy a mini cooper? That’s so Gerard!” I giggled as we got into the car “look, I am down to earth” he argued trying not to laugh himself as he drove us to the place “I don’t need a batman car because as I have already told you I am batman.... so I want to stay incognito so much so in fact that I thought we’d go here” he finished grinning as we pulled into the drive through of a burger joint.  
He ordered two of the house cheeseburgers before going to park up and eat, I teased him about how ‘classy’ this place was and we argued back and forth playfully as we ate what I can only describe as the best cheeseburger I’d had in my life, as we finished and he scrounged up her wrapper he suddenly asked “So when are you going to start dating me then?” as if he’d just asked about the weather.  
Not quite knowing if he was serious or not I slowly finished what was left of my burger as he sat there patiently waiting, his eyes searching my face for the answer to the question “When are you going to start asking?” I replied slowly measuring his reaction carefully “Well I am asking” his hazel eyes glinted in the moonlight “It’s not very romantic” I observed feeling an awkwardness growing in the pit of my stomach.

He thought for a moment quietly “well in first grade I gave a girl my booger and asked her out so I’ve evolved slightly from then, unless you want the booger?” he offered as I slapped him playfully and he giggled sweetly “Anyway, you’re leaving for tour soon so I have to kind of bite the bullet” he reasoned as the giggles subsided.  
“Well you should think of something while I am away then!” I mocked feeling nervous as I’d never really thought of Gerard in that way before and wasn’t sure I wanted anything more than a friendship from him, though I also couldn’t deny that he was one of the most interesting and funny people I knew and that it was a pleasure being his friend.  
We both sat in silence before he asked “How long are you away for?” I shifted slightly in the seat “six weeks” he nodded taking in the information before turning to me again “I’d better drop you home then” he started the engine and drove me the short distance back to my apartment, I asked him if we were okay because I really didn’t know what he was thinking by this time and I was irrationally worried that I’d offended him somehow.  
He just laughed and rolled his eyes “you don’t think I give up that easily do you?” he asked arching an eyebrow as I shrugged bewildered “You have fun on your tour and you’ll hear from me soon” he said as I finally went to get out of the car “take care” I told him as I closed the door behind me and walked to the front door, wondering all the while what he had meant and if any of this had been some weird dream.

I cracked on that Sunday getting everything wrapped up such as paperwork and routines because it always made me feel nervous when I left the business to fend for itself so to speak, even though I knew Kacie my second in command would look after the place and run all the sessions as meticulously as I would because she was a fantastic teacher and my very good friend.  
So after checking fifty million times that she knew the schedules, the important phone numbers and the alarm codes to get in and out of the building I finally packed up my belongings and hit the road with the dance troupe as planned.

Week one:  
The first stop was San Francisco where we were performing at a weeklong national dance competition as the opening act for the event, my studio was also one of the sponsors so it was great to network with other performers and get our names out there as well as getting me back out on the stage after a three year absence and I really enjoyed re connecting with old colleagues and friends.  
Once I got off stage one of the stagehands informed me that a parcel had been left for me by a courier and it was back stage in one of the rehearsal rooms, so confused at who would be sending me things I went down there to check it out.... it was a medium sized box wrapped in brown paper with ‘open me’ scrawled messily on the right hand top corner, so I did what it suggested and opened it. Inside was a beautiful watercolour painting of myself as a superhero, the note which came with it simply read ‘for those times when you forget that you’re a superhero....’ I smiled at how cute it was and proceeded to hang it up in my bunk as I am sure it was intended to be.

Week two:  
We’d passed through Vegas and were somewhere towards the southern states heading to phoenix where our own independent tour was kicking off, it was a small arena holding only around 2000 people but it was still exhilarating to be told that all the tickets had sold out in less than half a day so we were really psyched to be doing phoenix.  
We’d got off the bus around midday and hauled all our stuff into the arena ready for rehearsals to commence and after figuring out all the lighting, moves and which exits would be used for changes we took our lunch break ready for the guys to set up all the seating as the floor was covered in ice due to it being used as an ice rink in down season.  
It was here that I received my second gift from a courier who looked like he’d battled the whole of middle earth to get here and was unfortunately slightly sweaty and out of breath. I thanked him and took the candy pink box from him that was wrapped with a silver ribbon and read the neat card tag which was tied into the bow, it read ‘Because I’m missing something sweet.....’ in that same familiar handwriting and upon opening it found the most adorable, if not slightly squished oogie boogie cupcakes complete with jelly worms. The tag on the lid read ‘yes, I baked them myself (sorry) also forgot they’re fragile when posting them..... shit....’ I burst out laughing as I imagined him packing them all up and then realising the complications involved with shipping cupcakes to phoenix.  
Though I was also intrigued with how he had obtained our touring schedule seeing as he wasn’t very good with ‘that Google thing’ as he had often referred to it.... I suspected Mikey had some involvement there. Nevertheless they were really nice cupcakes even if I did have to pick some egg shells out of them from time to time and more importantly it showed that he cared and I was more than okay with that.

Week three:  
We were up in Salt Lake City now taking four days off as we had been hitting it hard and all my muscles reminded me that unfortunately I was no longer a teenager so we’d spent the four days sightseeing and shopping which after all is what girls do best.  
I’d also picked up a couple things that I saw and knew Gerard would like, whilst asking myself if that was weird.... Michelle the teams vice captain told me I was clearly thinking about him a lot if I had picked the stuff up and brought it without even remembering I’d done so. That made me blush and when she started singing about how I wanted to love him and hug him and kiss him and then proceeded to make smooching noises she received a fluffy cushion to the head in retaliation.  
I had also refrained from texting or calling him because I thought the distance was nice and I secretly wanted to see what he would come up with next because it was all so exciting, like a couple of school kids writing notes only I was the one reading them rather than writing them.... we got back to the hotel and concierge had informed me that a package was delivered for me and that they had placed it in my room for my convenience.  
I raced upstairs leaving Michelle with all the bags as butterflies lulled in my stomach because this was the favourite time of the week for me, once inside the room there was a large bright red and gold box sitting on the bed and I gingerly poked it worried that there was someone inside it as it was that big.  
There was no noise so I took it that it was safe and took the lid off, no sooner had I done so a huge Minnie mouse helium filled balloon glided out and bumped against the ceiling as she reviled an old tape recorded tied to her bright pink string. I smiled as he knew I loved all things Disney and pink and girly, and again I began to imagine him taking this balloon to a store to get it filled and walking back to his car with it firmly in hand let alone driving down the freeway with her riding shotgun.  
The tape recorder had a message on it which read ‘I’m kicking it old school, no MP3’s....’ I clicked play and listened as it cracked into life and Gerard’s vocals rang out into the small hotel room as Minnie floated above. It was a love song which he had written and sung acoustically, he mentioned how he never knew love existed until he’d met me and that he couldn’t describe how happy I make him feel just by knowing me....  
I’m not ashamed to say that it all got too much for me and I cried like a big girl as my heart ached for his company and just being able to hear his voice again burned my throat as I sobbed uncontrollably, like I said I’d never given a thought to love though now I was certain that my heart was.

Week four:  
We’d taken a detour and headed through Nebraska on our way to Denver due to some mechanical problems with the bus, this was going to be a short stop over as we needed to head down to Austin for a charity gig we had so we were only staying in Denver for one night.  
We got to the venue just in time for curtain up and pulled of a show without any rehearsals, something of which I never liked to do because half of the time something always goes wrong but someone was on our side tonight and the crowd loved it. We were just setting off again on the long drive to Texas when a van pulled in front of us and stopped the bus, worried that it was some psycho fan security jumped on the guy asking him what he was doing here and also asking if he was crazy for trying to stop a bus which would have turned his van into a pancake had the driver been so inclined.  
He pointed to the wrapped parcel in the passenger seat and said he needed to get this parcel to a girl on the tour as they’d missed us in Nebraska and had followed us all the way to Denver. I jumped off the bus telling the guys that it was okay before apologising to the young man and giving him a very generous tip for all his efforts as well as gas money because it was a long drive.  
He took it from the seat and gave it to me triumphantly remarking that he wasn’t a courier but a merch boy for thirty seconds to mars and Jared was helping a friend out who had asked him to bring it down as they passed the state on their own tour and that he was rendezvousing with them in Iowa later. He was out of breath by the time he’d told me all this and I laughed, thanked him again and said my goodbyes as I re-boarded the bus and went straight back to my bunk where I’d unwrap it, I also sent Jared a text to say that the poor boy should get a raise and thank you for all the trouble they went through. He text back ‘okay Stuart deserves it, it was a mission from mars! Anything for friends, you need to date him... x’ I shook my head thinking he was one to talk considering he didn’t like settling down and much like me had the attitude of I’m too busy for a relationship but declined texting him back as I concentrated on ripping the brown paper off the package in my lap.

It was one of Gerard’s Metallica hoodies the note that was tucked inside it read ‘For those times you get cold.... especially at night, I haven’t washed it because I don’t know how... sorry’ I pressed it to my face drinking in the familiar scent of him and it enveloped me in what felt like a warm glow as if his arms were around me then.  
I put it on hurriedly as if the smell would fade if I didn’t and sat in bed with the hood up looking like a wrath due to it being too big for my petite frame but loving every minute of it, and as my eyes grew heavy and the wheels rocked me towards sleep I imagined him there with me and my last conscious thought was ‘he’s never getting this back now’

Week five:  
Austin was full of cheer as all the acts lined up to take part in the charity drive and by the time the night was over we had helped to raise over fifty thousand dollars for the charity which felt great and really spurred us on for our own shows a few days later.  
It was our last night in Texas so to celebrate before heading back to LA for the last shows of the tour we went out for dinner at a local steak house with all the crew and managers and had a really good evening reminiscing about all the things we’d done over the last five weeks.  
Later as I packed the rest of my stuff and slipped back into Gerard’s hoodie there was a knock at the door, when I opened it I was greeted by a huge bouquet of blood red roses in a crystal vase. The hotel manager himself had come to deliver them as he wanted to make sure I got them okay, once he had left I gazed at them in awe as they were so beautiful and I’d never received such a magnificent bunch of flowers in all my life.  
In the middle I spotted a note which was attached to one of the roses, though this one looked slightly different from the others and it was only after I had picked up the note and read it that I understood why. The note simply read ‘He gave her twelve roses..... eleven real and one fake and told her that he would love her till the last one dies....’ I could feel my eyes welling up and wondered how I had not seen what a hopeless romantic Gerard was from all the conversations we’d had over the years.  
I’d already made my decision by then so I gathered up my things along with the roses and took them down to where the bus was waiting because I needed to get home.

Week six:  
We arrived in LA and threw ourselves into press conferences as the tour had garnered a lot of attention over the weeks and all the popular US shows wanted in on the action so we were caught up in this tornado of lights and drama.  
We were performing the first two nights of the week at the Greek theatre and last three nights of the tour at the staples centre which caused a lot of chaos with rehearsals and all the other things we had to do but we thoroughly enjoyed it and knew at the end of each night that we’d put our hearts into it. I hadn’t heard from Gerard but I could always feel his presence even though he didn’t make it known to me so I knew he was always watching and waiting for the perfect time to say hi, it got to the last night and I was worried that he wasn’t there because I hadn’t seen him or felt his presence so I found myself peeking out from back stage every five minutes as the arena filled up slowly.  
Resigning myself to the fact that he probably wasn’t coming and that I’d have to hop a cab over to his place once we were finished and see him, I sucked it up and went out on stage to do what I was best at and do what everyone had come to see. As the lights went down at the end of the set we thanked them all for coming out, we thanked our managers and tour crew and friends and family whilst tears were shed and promises made we said a final farewell to them all as we exited the stage homeward bound.  
I changed quickly as thoughts rushed through my head wondering if he would still be up at this time seeing as it was late I grabbed my bag and headed out only for Michelle to grab my arm and ask me if I wanted to split a cab as she didn’t like travelling alone. I said I thought her boyfriend Danny was picking her up and she told me he’d been delayed so she was going to hop a cab, so rather than leave a friend alone I agreed to share one and we headed in the direction of the pickups.  
No sooner had we gotten outside into the bitter air I noticed something stood next to a car I didn’t recognise, as I went to turn to where the cabs were waiting Michelle steered me back towards the strange thing with a grin on her face. As we got closer I noticed the figure was a huge hello kitty, one of the things I have loads of even a tattoo on my wrist so I laughed thinking that the guys had brought me a huge teddy for my ever growing collection.  
Then I noticed a face and realised suddenly amidst Michelle’s giggles that it was actually Gerard dressed in a hello kitty costume looking slightly uncomfortable but happy to see me.

I squealed and took his outstretched paws as I realised that they’d all been in on it from the start, he laughed as he pulled me into a very warm and fluffy embrace “what’s with the outfit?” I asked softly so only he could hear “what outfit?” he asked playing dumb as I reached up to tuck the loose lock of hair back into his ‘kitty head’ “well I thought you were batman?” I mused “I was trying to think of a reference to how we got to this point in our lives.... and it was simple, you had me at hello” he brought his over sized paw up to touch the side of my face.  
“I don’t remember a hello....” he screwed his face up adorably “I believe it was a hey which technically counts” I sighed dramatically and he laughed “are you ever going to let me win?” he asked casually “maybe” he lent in closer then “well if not then can you just let me kiss you already because I’ve been kinda waiting for over four years” I succumbed to him then and finally allowed myself to feel what I had wanted for the past few weeks, that long lingering kiss which completely knocks the wind out of you and cements their place in your heart forever.

And now as I write this, three years on we are happily married with two beautiful children and a couple dogs, we sold both of our apartments and brought a house in a nice neighbourhood not too far from both of our studios and we are still very much in love. I sit on my own sometimes and reminisce about those times and think about the stories I’ll tell our daughter Payton when she is old enough and hope that they instil in her some sort of hope for her own future because as mummy and daddy have proved fairytales don’t only exist in Disney.


End file.
